The Temptations of Black Friday

Black Friday is an abomination. And I sinned on the day by heading off to my nearest den of iniquity - Harvey Norman's - where I purchased a 42 inch screen television. It looked so small sitting there in the store with its bigger cousins showing off their 65 inch size matters screens It's installed now and, suddenly, my living-room has changed proportions. It's become terrifyingly small and is now dominated by this monstrous screen which, when I turn it on, reveals what I never noticed before - wrinkles, pimples, carbuncles, blackheads, boils, warts, moles, stubble, double-double chins and strange clumps of facial hair - all demanding my attention. On last night's news I counted every one of Mick Wallace's golden curls. I thought David Davin Power was going to leave his customary perch outside Dail Eireann and accost me in my armchair. I'm sure this is just a period of adjustment. Me and my 42 inch screen will soon be best of buddies - but next Black Friday I'm staying in bed all day - because there's always the danger I'll want the 65 inch curved screen by then!