The Eloquent Senator Norris

Women have a tough time in politics. Two recent examples - Lapgate, so called because Tom Barry TD pulled a reluctant and surprised female colleague onto his lap in the middle of one of the most important and contentious issues to come before Dail Eireann  - the long-over due legislation of the X Case which will allow abortion in very limited and specific circumstances. The other more recent example was David Norris's verbal attack on Regina Doherty in Seanad Eireann when he accused her of 'talking through her fanny.'

The following poem is a tribute to the eloquence of Senator Norris.

   

The Eloquent Senator Norris 

Oh, David, you’re a terror when you decide to fire

Verbal bullets primed with misogynistic ire.

A woman has a ‘fanny’ – that fact we can’t deny -

But it is not a mouthpiece with which to make reply.

You may be incandescent but is it right to hog

The floor of Seanad Éireann with a sexist monologue? 

In fact, your own vocabulary is not exactly sparse

Yet when have we accused you of talking through your arse?

You speak about linguistics and discussions academic

But sexist rough and tumble has always been endemic

In the Dail and Seanad where bombastic eloquence

Is used as substitution for a dose of common sense.

© Laura Elliot 

Knees Up In the Dail Bar

Sometimes you've just got to laugh at the antics of politicians - even when the subject matter is serious, as is the current contentious debate on the long overdue legislation of the X case. The following poem is my salute to the deputies in Dail Eireann who, when forced to work into the small wee hours, really show their mettle. 

           KNEES-UP IN THE DAIL BAR
Some were saying rosaries and singing songs of praise
Twenty years engagement in political affrays
Was drawing to conclusion within the hallowed walls
Of Leinster House where T.D’s had been setting out their stalls.

James was quite determined to legislate with speed
The verdict on the X case, a judgement once decreed.
Lucinda claimed that ‘group think’ was a cultural disgrace.
So Enda rapped her knuckles to put her in her place.

Amendments were debated as nocturnal hours flew
Eloquence was at its best served with a brew or two.
Abortion is a woman’s right? Abortion is a crime?
The T.Ds in the Dail Bar heard no one calling time.

Some deputies were wavering because they feared a belt
From a bishop’s crozier if they protected women’s health.
But no one thought to check the bar where whiskey and the beer
Had made them rather frisky – or so it did appear.

Now it was reassuring to know that T.D. Tom
Was engaged in horse play – and not acting the gom.
A lass on lap without permit was only having fun
Abortion’s just a woman’s lot – when all is said and done.

Oh, it was a jolly knees-up that took place in the Dail
As deputies decided to stand or take a fall.
Abortion through the back door? A woman’s right to choose?
Argued in the Dail Bar with scruples and with booze.

© Laura Elliot